Tag Archives: Fat

On relationships. And cheating.

Remember the first time you fell in love? Exhilarating and monumental, right? The best relationships make you feel smart, sexy and content. They’re incredibly fun and extremely exciting. Until they’re not. And then you get fat. It’s inevitable, you’re feeling single, sexy and … Continue reading

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On Passing Out. And General Hospital.

Remember that episode of General Hospital when Robin Scorpio passed out at the gym from working out too hard? No. Before she had HIV. I don’t know what year. Ricky Martin wasn’t livin la vida loca; he was still living in … Continue reading

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Are you there God? It’s Me, the Fat Kid.

Hey God, Remember me? You gave me cancer and made me fat on top of it. Not cool. Anywho… I was thinking…There’s a way you can make it up to me. Here’s the thing: I’ve been doing Taylor Lautner’s ab … Continue reading

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F— You and Your F—ing Cleanse

Forgive my language, I really hate to be crass, but there’s a heat wave in Los Angeles and The Fat Kid in Me is feeling very irritable. Sure, when it’s 107 degrees in The Valley it’s a great excuse to … Continue reading

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The Fat Kid at the Beach

The Fat Kid in Me has been hard at work in the gym, so it’s only fitting that he spend a day at the beach to show off his awesome average body. I brought along my friend, Naturally Thin (eye … Continue reading

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Hey (Trader) Joe

Dear Joe, We have a love/hate relationship. You make some pretty nifty shit food. Your frozen Organic Brown Rice is a real treat when I need a complex carb on the quick. Your NonFat Vanilla Yogurt is da bomb, albeit … Continue reading

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Thoughts From the Gym, Vol 1

I went to the gym today. The great thing about being an actor is that you can convince yourself of anything. Today I convinced myself that I was an athlete training for the Olympics and I wound up working out … Continue reading

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