Thoughts From the Gym, Hunger Games Edition

  1. Is that Peeta Mellark?
  2. That’s Peeta Mellark.
  3. He’s the size of my leg.
  4. I could totally beat him at The Hunger Games.
  5. Wait, how long could I go without eating?
  6. Maybe he would beat me.
  7. My strategy would have to be:kill him and then eat him.
  8. Ugh.
  9. He seems like he’d be gamey.
  10. Why is everyone here wearing a headband except me?
  11. I’m glad I’m not wearing a headband.
  12. If aliens landed today they’d kill everyone with a headband and save me.
  13. A thought about your tapered leg sweatpants: NO.
  14. And that goes for you too, guy in the sweatpants with a zipper leg.
  15. My skin looks awesome.
  16. Probably because I’ve been going more vegan.
  17. Oh shit those vegan oatmeal chocolate chip cookies.
  18. 7 cookies at 140 calories each is…
  19. ugh
  20. where’s my phone?
  21. Why hasn’t anyone texted me?
  22. 980
  23. fuck
  24. OUCH
  25. That machine came outta nowhere
  26. Oh no I have to tell Your Facebook Status Sounds Like a Suicide Note that her bearded gym crush has terrible B.O.
  27. What if she stops coming to the gym?
  28. I can’t tell her.
  29. She probably wouldn’t even care.
  30. I still don’t have the butt I want
  31. fucking genetics
  32. My abs look better
  33. they’d look great if I stopped drinking
  34. [laughs]
  35. [laughs some more]
  36. god I’d be intolerable
  37. people would hate me
  38. “yes, actually I am using that.”
  39. “I’m in between sets.”
  40. “sure, if you wipe it down.”
  41. what an asshole
  42. now I just feel like leaving
  43. I can’t leave he’ll think I lied to him about being in between sets
  44. god my hair looks good
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3 Responses to Thoughts From the Gym, Hunger Games Edition

  1. doug wheeler says:

    I ❤ these so much! I can so relate. Hilarious!

  2. Kristen Boseo says:

    You’re hysterical. I love reading these.

    PS. In regards to cutting out all sweets, I could never do it, so… May the odds be ever in your favor 🙂

  3. Mareana says:

    I started reading your blog a week ago and damnit while it makes me laugh on the treadmill and almost fall you make my 6 miles go by faster. Did you see see Jennifer Lawrence’s dress at the GG’s? I thought I couldn’t be more in love with her and then she opened her mouth and was self deprecating and hilarious. Last, have you watched “The Taste”? It’s an unabashed rip off of “The Voice” but WITH FOOD. I just thought another fat kid at heart might wanna know. Mwah!

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